Change is an evolutionary process requiring loving education, patience with oneself and others, and the passage of time as the believers deepen their knowledge of the principles of the Faith, gradually discard long-held traditional attitudes and progressively conform their lives to the unifying Teachings of the Cause. (Universal House of Justice, Lights of Guidance, p. 621)
I’m just learning how harsh I am with myself – I beat myself up so often, especially when I read the Bahá’í Writings. I see how far I am from being the kind of Bahá’í I want to be, and it fills me with contempt and self-hatred. I recognize this well-worn rut for what it is – it’s become my addiction. Putting these negative thoughts on the hamster wheel inside my head and nursing them gives me the adrenaline rush I’ve come to know and depend on, just as an alcoholic depends on the next drink or the drug addict on the next fix. Something needs to change. I’m powerless to do it myself. Along comes this quote, and challenges the voices inside my head.
It’s OK to not be perfect! Change is an evolution. I’m not expected to go from awareness to perfection, without the need for further loving education, patience and the passage of time. Beating myself up is hardly the kind of education that works with anyone. In fact I would never do to others what I do to myself. I can take a deep breath, and breathe in God’s love for me and in doing so, letting it rub off on me. I can cultivate patience. I can keep deepening my knowledge of the principles of the Faith and gradually, one day at a time, discard these long-held idle fancies as I progressively conform my life to the unifying teachings of the Cause.
Knowing I can discard the drug of self-hatred and adrenalizing and cultivate the drug of love, acceptance, peace, patience, faith and trust, I am grateful!
What jumped out for you as you read today’s meditation? I’d love it if you would share so we can all expand our knowledge of the Writings!
If you liked this meditation, you might also like my book Learning How to Forgive